a reward to self

last saturday, i went to a dinner. MAKPA.. a college dinner.

and i was awarded with an award. alhamdulillah.. at least, i got something for myself. after being a hardworking students & daughter. i got something for myself. no.. its not the end yet. got a long journey to go. & i have to do many things in order to have another reward for myself & of course for my dearest parents.

mom & dad.. this is the least i can give you for the moment. wait for me till i end up this journey. i'll give u a lot more. insyaAllah.. doakan yang terbaik untuk anakmu.

last but not least. thanx mak & ayah for all the guidance, lessons & everything that both of u give to me since my existence in mom's tummy till now. thanks a lot.

my days

these few days, i wasn't living it to the fullest. till now.. too many things happened. my fault? hurmm. maybe.

aku kembali jatuh. ye.. jatuh tersungkur. sakit. luka dalam. parah. aku tersembam. sakit sangat.

faham?

i don't feel the same anymore. ya Allah. dugaan apekah ini?

sampai satu saat.. aku dah tak bermaya langsung. alangkah bgus kalau aku tak elak dari kne langgar haritu. alangkah bagus kalau aku statik je, tggu sampai kne langgar. alangkah bagus kalau kat ctu juga nafas terakhir aku..!!!

ye.. ni saat nya. saat aku dah tak bermaya nak bangun. saat aku jatuh, dan aku x mampu nak bangun sendiri. sekarang.. aku tak bermaya. aku tahu akan hukumnya meminta kematian. aku tahu hukumnya. tapi aku tak berdaya.

terima kasih Allah untuk hidup penuh warna warni. terima kasih untuk pelangi pelangi. terima kasih untuk segalanya. terima kasih untuk meminjamkan nyawa. terima kasih semua orang.