♥ eQa | RosLan ♥: i wish i could have more time...

Thursday, April 12, 2012

i wish i could have more time...

i wish.. i could have more & more precious times with my one & only sister. huu~ well, now we're counting the days.

another 43-days to go..!!! yurpp.. 43 days left before she becomes someone's someone :(

i am happy. & i am not happy.

i am happy, because... she'll become a wife sooner. she'll marry & have her own family. at last. at the age of 28. hee~

& i am sad. because... she's no longer mine. i mean. everything gonna change. the life between us. after 22 years of my life. be with her. fights, sharing this & that, do this & that, together. the two of us. laughing. crying. hurmm. then. when the days come, it's not going to be the same anymore. she belongs to someone, she has her own responsibility.

22 years of my life. i don't think its enough for me to be with her. ya laa.. we are hardly to stay together. seeing each other when we have holidays. since kids. i was in standard 1, & she was in standard 6. there's only a year i had the chance to be with her in school. then she entered secondary school. she stayed in hostel. & i studied as usual in primary school. we had fights. almost every-time we saw each other. then after secondary, she went to matriculation college. & i then entered my secondary school & yes, hostel of course. so, we were hardly to meet each other for a long period of time. seeing each other when we had the same holidays.

after that, she went to further her study in Pahang. i was is secondary school. when she had her semester break, i was in my hostel. when i had my school break, she was in Pahang. & few years passed, i went to Terengganu. & she worked in Melaka. got the chance to meet her, only when i had my semester break. againn. after that, u know it already. haihhh~!

& now. 43 days from now.. she is someone's wife. can't believe that time moves so fast & makes me feel something. something uneasy. huu~! how am i going to let go my one & only sister. seriously, i can't imagine how's my life is going to be after this. i mean.. yeahhh... i still can have her. but.. u know. it is going to be different. kann?

& how am i hoping & wishing that before her BIG day.. i wanna have some private & precious time with her. without anyone else. just the two of us or just the five of us. ayah, mak, abang, she & me.

ohhh. i miss my childhood. & how i wish that i could go to my childhood era & just stay at there. playing with my siblings & cousins. running & jumping. main masak-masak. main kejar-kejar. ya Allah. sungguh aku rindu saat2 itu. sungguh aku tak ingin masa berjalan begitu pantas.

sister... i will always pray for your happiness. be happy kakak. i love you. wish i could have more & more time to be with u. just the two of us. ingt tak. dlu aku pernah cakap macam ni. "kak, tayah la kawen". ingt? huu~!

& masa terus berjalan tanpa menghiraukan kerisauan & kesedihan dalam hati.

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